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Ant by marleni16 Ant by marleni16
Hello everybody I would like to introduce to you my short life experience comic.

This comic book is name Ant- short for Antony. Before I tell you about the comic how about I tell you the whole reason why I choose this in the first place. Honestly not really hoping to make money or anything mostly to express myself. My professor has ask me how will this comic sale? Well maybe some people might like the layout and art or short story. I think my comic is a bit different what am hoping to gain is to see what type of people might like it and why?. I wrote this comic because of boyfriend of mine has pass away due to cancer. I think some people out their has experience at least a certain lost in their life, and have no idea how hard it is to get back up in the morning trying to keep telling you're self everything is going to be better. I want you guys to know life is hard, unfair but also their are so many great things about it also. I wrote this short comic because a person so good to me gave me so many wonderful memories that I just wanted to share it with you. He taught me how love even more life, and to enjoy every moment like it was your last. The ending is sad but this comic is not a nonfiction comic is a real life experience. so please be kind to tell me if you like it. The lay out was design in order for anybody to simply understand. when I draw I try to see my self as a guest trying to see how easy this can be. If I ever wanted to sell something I would think my style to sell is because is simple since I like simple. This comic is not about showing you how to stand back up, no is just memory I spend in till he finally pass away. That is something I cannot draw because all solve problems in a different way. But I guess what I wanted to say in the comic was my favorite quote you don't know what you have till is gone. Trust me I knew what I had that's why I Cherish everything. Thank you for taking time to read my short comic.
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Aug 19, 2012
thanks everybody
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011
whoa, i was not expecting that many comments thank you :)
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:iconunknowner:
unknowner Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2011
It's a bit messy, but charming. The photo backgrounds feel like a cheap shortcut, though, and the whole thing could use a spellchecker. The end is probably the weakest... as in literature, in good comics, you should show - not tell. That last panel does a LOT of telling. Keep going. I'm curious to see how this turns out.
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:iconforgotten-angel777:
forgotten-angel777 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2011
Your art is interesting but your dialogue it too wordy. You're layout is easy to ready, but the text has horrible errors. I would suggest some editing. It is hard to be interested in the story you are trying to tell when you're trying to piece together the meaning of the sentence. Keep making stuff, I'll be watching!
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:iconnoelnohana:
noelnohana Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2011  Student Filmographer
this is Leon from class. Awesome job. glad i got to see the final version. keep up the awesome work and welcome to DA.
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011
hey thanks
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:iconsprite420:
sprite420 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2011
oh! and i really hope you keep going! i look forward to your next comic. =)
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011
whoa i was not expecting so many comments am glad :)
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:iconsprite420:
sprite420 Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2011
you did a wonderful job blending photos with your drawings. it looks great! and you shared a very touching personal story. there are many of us out there who have been through similar experiences and can relate. the only problem, (similar to Jayne2520's comment,) is that the readers who could relate to your story don't actually know what the story is about until the end. and not everybody will read all the way to the end if you don't get their attention in the beginning. if you could find some way to indicate *from the beginning* that this is a story about illness, love, loss, your comic would be much more powerful. remember, you don't always have to present a story as "beginning, middle, end." some stories are better told end-first or from the middle. ;)
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011
hmm i understand thanks for the tip.
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:iconxmassmouse:
xmassmouse Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2011
Agree with all the above. this could be a really good year long story arc! I also wanted to add emphasis to Sparklerox's grammar concerns. I am by no means a grammar nazi, and minor errors do not bother me, but it does bother some ppl which is a thing to keep in mind. More importantly, at times the captions become hard to understand. Once the grammar negatively impacts your ability to communicate your message it becomes more problematic.

The good news is that, as with anything, making good grammar come naturally is something you can work on. Basic online tutorials or grammar workbooks from stores can be good short term boosters, but can also be a bit dry, and wont necessarily make understandable grammar second nature. a really great way to work on grammar is to just up the amount you read in a given week. I know you are probably a student and do not have too much time for pleasure reading, but even going through a collection of comics every few days could be a huge boost to your skills over time. Also, as you are a student, if this is something you might want to work in long term, taking a creative writing class could be a great way to help you come to terms with how grammar works. as with visual arts, language is built of parts that function together to make an impression. Learning how this system functions can let you play with it and start to bend the rules in interesting ways while still being comprehensible. just like how art classes often start students out on painting spheres and pieces of fruit before moving them on to more abstract forms of expression, you need to learn the rules before you can break them.

This was kind of a ramble, but I hope it helps. You have a great talent that could be parleyed into some very interesting comics if you can work on your fundamentals. Please do so!
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:iconmesilliac:
mesilliac Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2011
Hey, just wanted to say keep it up. I know it's tough when you put your feelings out on display, and i like how you communicate what you learned and how you changed. Others have already said the criticisms i have. If there's one thing i would add, it's more small details, to make the reader care about the people in the story. Thanks for sharing :).
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2011
thank u for understanding :)
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:iconnonier:
NonieR Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2011
Deepest sympathy.
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:icontheghosty:
TheGhosty Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2011
The style is very interesting and I like it a lot.
Like the others have said, don't try to fit so much information into a small space. Spread it out, have more panels for one scene.
I really appreciate you taking the time to communicate the events in your life, and I hope you continue drawing comics.
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011
thank u
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:icontheghosty:
TheGhosty Featured By Owner Oct 9, 2011
No problem :O
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2012
ur asome
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:iconjayne2520:
Jayne2520 Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2011
Comics are a form of communication, and I like your message but you're not saying it very well. It's like you're trying to say a lot in a single breath! Slow down and don't try to fit so much into so few panels.

In the first panel, I couldn't tell why she was waiting for him or how they even knew each other. You need a better buildup so the reader knows she's meeting him for the first time.
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:iconkerere:
kerere Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2011
Good start. Don't give up on comics. The story style here seems like some zines. It is not something I have seen yet in webcomics, so I am very happy to see it. That is part of the joy of them for me - many styles. Like others have said, run everything through a spell checker program. Also as I read I always thought the next panel would go in a different direction than it actually did, which was a problem. Finally, very good blending of photos and drawing. I haven't seen it before. You're the first! Develop that style more, it works well. Good start.
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011
thanks for encoring words
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:iconsparklerox:
SparkleRox Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2011
Study study study anatomy and how to make comics flow, especially with dialog. This is practically unreadable, though the idea is a good start. Also is English your first language? The grammar and spelling are not very good (especially you're versus your).
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011
yeah i know it was hard, i did readsearch
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:iconmarleni16:
marleni16 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011
thank u, first comic :)
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July 26, 2011
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